Between 12 and 15 months, toddlers are just starting to get a handle on self-feeding. They’ll improve quickly, learning to scoop food and bring it to their mouth, though spills and throws are part of the process. It’s normal for toddlers to experiment by flinging food or playing with it—this is how they learn about cause and effect and practice coordination.
By 18 months, many toddlers can use utensils like spoons and forks and drink from cups, but they might not always want to. Sometimes mealtime turns into playtime with food as their “art supplies” or “airplanes.” Around their second birthday, some children start to care more about keeping clean and get upset by messes or spills. Others take longer and might still be quite messy eaters at three years old, which is perfectly okay.
Why This Matters
Self-feeding isn’t just about eating—it builds independence, fine motor skills, and confidence. Encouraging your toddler to feed themselves helps them feel in control and supports their growth into capable eaters. It can be challenging when messes happen, but this is a natural and important part of learning.
Try This at Home
-
Use unbreakable dishes and cups so spills and tosses don’t turn into accidents or broken items.
-
Gently but firmly discourage throwing food by calmly putting utensils away if the behavior continues during a meal.
-
Celebrate successes, like when your toddler uses a spoon well, and be patient during messy moments—cleaning up is part of the process!
Source: American Academy of Pediatrics. Caring for Your Baby and Young Child: Birth to Age 5 (2009)