1. Pause and Breathe First
Before helping your child, notice your own feelings.
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Is your heart racing?
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Are you getting tense?
Take a few deep breaths. This sends a signal to your body — and your child — that things are okay.
2. Connect at Their Level
When a child is upset, get close without towering over them.
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Sit or kneel to make eye contact if that feels comfortable for your child.
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A calm face and gentle voice help them feel safe.
3. Name the Feeling
Naming emotions helps children learn to understand them.
Try:
“You look really frustrated. It’s okay to feel that way.”
You’re validating the feeling, not the behavior.
4. Use Soothing Touch (If They’re Open to It)
A hug, hand squeeze, or cuddling close can release “feel-good” hormones and build connection.
5. Try a Calming Exercise Together
Teach strategies before you need them.
Ideas include:
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Belly breathing
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Box breathing
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“Butterfly breathing” (hands on chest/shoulders, breathing slowly)
Model it yourself:
“I’m going to do our breathing because it helps me calm down.”
Kids may join in when they’re ready.
Source: Adapted from content by the Child Mind Institute. Read the full article at: https://childmind.org